Fake News: All The King's Horses (1/3)
Title: All The King's Horses, 1/3
Fandom: The Colbert Report
Rating: R overall
Words: ~2700
Warnings: This story gave the author nightmares. Proceed with caution.
Disclaimer: Two.

For the Report characters: They and their universe are property of Stephen Colbert, the other Report writers, and of course Viacom. Not mine. Sue me not, please.

And for the real people, the poem:
Please, make no mistake:
these people aren't fake,
but what's said here is no more than fiction.
It only was writ
because we like their wit
and wisecracks, and pull-squints, and diction.
We don't mean to quibble,
but this can't be libel;
it's never implied to be real.
No disrespect's meant;
if you disapprove, then,
the back button's right up there. Deal.

Notes: It was impossible to write this one with "Stephen" as he is on TCR. He simply isn't strong enough to go through it. So this chapter is spent fixing up some of his other damage first.


( The pundits on the far left crowed hypocrisy; the religious right denounced him entirely. The late-night comics batted around jokes at his expense like tennis balls. )