Fake News: Expecting, Chapter 7
Title: Expecting, Chapter 7: Calls of the Worried
Series: The Colbert Report
Rating: G for this part
Words: ~1900
Disclaimer: Two.

For the Report characters: They and their universe are property of Stephen Colbert, the other Report writers, and of course Viacom. Not mine. Sue me not, please.

And for the real people, the poem:
Please, make no mistake:
these people aren't fake,
but what's said here is no more than fiction.
It only was writ
because we like their wit
and wisecracks, and pull-squints, and diction.
We don't mean to quibble,
but this can't be libel;
it's never implied to be real.
No disrespect's meant;
if you disapprove, then,
the back button's right up there. Deal.

Notes: Rather than use the names of Colbert-the-actor's kids, Stephen's kids in-story are based on the ones he's named in various segments. More details here.

Clips referenced: It's not a date or anything; fall in love all over again; adult diapers; Bobby's replacement.

For the full table of contents to this story, click here.




( In the present, worried kids call Jon. In the past, a worried Jon calls Dr. Moreau. Either way, a lot of worrying occurs. How much of it is justified? )